"Original Plan", is ther such thing as plan???

Have you ever felt so much disappointed in your life because you won't be able to meet your original plan? Well, I have.

When I started working here in Cebu, I've got a lot of plans. I don't want to stay in this field forever, so I decided to make stepping stones for myself.
1. Work here for two years (or least have some savings)
2. Resign from this job, go home and re-apply for another one (since I have saved here, money is not an issue anymore)
3. Get another degree in college (2nd courser - BSA or BSBA, business-related)
4. Graduate and take board exam (if applicable)
5. Either resign from job and get another, accountant perhaps, OR put up business
6. Get married and have children.

Before I got this first job, even before I got into college, I said to myself, planning isn't important. I'll just go with the flow. This is because I didn't plan to study Computer Science. But after graduating, I planned my life carefully. I've got a wonderful plan. And when I got here, I was happy - the first phase.

A lot of wonderful things played in my mind. I am away from my family, I can be as independent as I want, and I have a high-paying job. I know I can save money for a second course. But my plan was...let's say..destroyed??? The moment I got pregnant, I knew for myself, I can't continue to step up. Getting pregnant was a huge roadblock that I can't get thru.

All of a sudden, I'm a mother. Single parent, that is. The original plan was ruined, and there's no way to turn back time, or to return to the road that I've set. The supposed-to-be smooth-sailing journey became so rough, and there's no way out. I sank.

Hmmm..getting back to the original plan. At least I finished the first year of my first stage (with no savings at all); I jumped into step 6 (not totally since I have a child first before getting married); then going back to step 2, resigning and reapplying for a job (but money is still a very big issue); and no more steps 3, 4, and 5. What a plan, huh?

I don't have plans again. And I don't want to make one anymore. I don't believe in plans. I guess I'll stick to what I believe before, don't make plans - just go with the flow and see what happens. Plans are dumb.

Help Us...

Hello again! It's been a long time. Well, I've been very busy lately. I've got no time for chitchats. Got a long list of things to catch up.

To start off, I've got gastritis (that's just great!!!). When I was in elementary, I almost got UTI. In college, hyperacidity, which almost lead to ulcer. And now, this! The doctor said it's because of stress. Gosh! Only a QA but got sick because of stress. Hehe..It's not the real reason anyway. Reason is, I always thought of my son left in our hometown, then my brother who got separated, and finally, my parents who are about to be separated. Great family, huh??? *sigh...I've been thinking too much.

Enough about me!

My Brother, as I've said, got separated. I hope he's OK. Then my parents, I believe, are just friends now who live under one roof. They don't sleep together anymore, my mother found a reason not to. She's sleeping with my son. But despite her belief that they're just friends, my father still loves her. I know that.

Nyway, my Sister, is pregnant again, her second child. But last week, before her birthday (she's supposed to be Juana..hehehe), she was taken to the hospital -- bleeding. She originally got a flu, which lead to fever. If my memory serves me right, she got hospitalized for three days, two nights. Now, she just waiting. After two weeks, she'll have an ultrasound again to see if the child survived. =(

I'm here, smiling infront of my teammates. But deep inside, I am miserable. What have we done to deserve this? All of us are facing this big challenge -- big problems. I worry that we won't make it. But I don't lose hope. I pray that we can overcome this obstacle. *sigh

Jamiel Myles 2

I am posting new pictures of my son. I just downloaded them from my phone. Enjoy...

Here are new ones.

Here's when he was one day old.

Here's when he's more than a month old.

Server Problems

New tasks came in today, testers will be very busy now. We'll be tackling the Linux version of our software, and we're still in the process of learning it (from insalling Linux to our terminals, to installing mounting it to the network, to installing the software itself). *sigh...so much to do, so little time.

Anyway, we've got bigger problems. We cannot access ALL our servers, they are not connected to the company's network. We have to ask help from our ITS so that we can access it again. *sigh

We can't do anything work-related until these problems are solved. I hope we can start soon.

Well, that's all for now. I'll be posting more of my son's pictures...:D